Step in the Ring

In response to Mayo vs. Miracle Whip

There’s no question here: mayo all the way. Comparing Miracle Whip to mayo is like comparing Twinkies to éclairs. If I ever found myself living in a trailer in Alabama, making a bologna sandwich on Wonder Bread, I’d consider Miracle Whip. But even then I’d have to give it some serious thought.

Where I grew up, in Belgium, mayo is an integral part of life–nothing less than the glue that holds society together while clogging its arteries. And yes, if you’ve seen Pulp Fiction, it’s true: we do drown our French fries in mayo. Mmmm.

On special occasions, my mother would make fresh mayonnaise. If you ever find yourself with some left-over egg yolks after making your healthy breakfast egg-white omelet, I really recommend using those yolks for some fresh mayo. Simply blend 4 yolks with 1 teaspoon of salt, 1 teaspoon of Dijon mustard, 3 tablespoons of white wine vinegar, and 1 tablespoon of fresh lemon juice. Then drizzle in about 2 cups of vegetable oil while blending on high. Adding some finely chopped parsley will give it a great extra zing. After tasting this, I’m sure you’ll agree that Miracle Whip is truly an abomination unto God.

Photo by Alpha. Some rights reserved.

To make matters even worse, Kraft recently changed the formula of Miracle Whip. Water is now the first (main) ingredient, rather than soybean oil. Apparently this means that many dishes that have to sit overnight, such as coleslaw or potato salad, turn into a watery mess.

Let’s face it: neither of them is exactly good for you. Half the fat of mayo is still plenty of fat. My advice: go for moderation but enjoy the real thing.

Submitted by Stefan Raets. Stefan is a refugee from the corporate world. When he isn’t reading or writing, he’s probably feeding or diapering his newborn son.

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